I NEED HELP PLEASE!!!
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Review your informational article. Choose one body paragraph to revise. Copy this paragraph into a new document.
Combine two or more sentences in your paragraph for varied syntax.
Review your paragraph for any use of passive voice. Revise those sentences.
Write a short reflection paragraph on the revision process. Describe the changes you made and how these changes improved your writing.
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Submit your work in 02.09 Syntax and Voice.
This is my body: Second, let's talk about the negative effects of this situation. One of the negative effects is that computers offer the advantage of doing much more than playing games. Like I said before, video games can have good effects and bad effects, but this one is definitely one of the bad , because this could really mess up the value and the advantages, since not all computers function the same way, and here's why.'' They offered game developers enhanced more, speed, and display capabilities, allowing the creation of more complex games. Furthermore, another negative effect would be, '' The Fairchild Video Entertainment System, from 1976, and the Atari 2600 VCS( Video Computer System), from 1977, were the first systems to use game cartridges that were inserted into special slots.
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Ответ:
See explanation.
Explanation:
Second, let's talk about the negative effects of this situation. One of the adverse effects is that computers offer the advantage of doing much more than playing games. Since not all computers function the same way, it can create good and bad effects, messing up the value and the advantages. (What are the quotes for and where do they stop?)''They offered game developers enhanced(missing a word?) more, speed, and display capabilities, allowing the creation of more complex games. Furthermore, another negative effect would be,(quotes here but where do they end?) '' The Fairchild Video Entertainment System, from 1976, and the 1977 Atari 2600 VCS (Video Computer System), were the first systems to use game cartridges inserted into special slots.
Ответ: